The perfect day

If I were using matlab to track my productivity Friday would have been 'NA'. I actually had a wonderful day. I didn't do any work and I spent time with Julie, which is always pleasant. I actually didn't even feel guilty for not doing any work, and that is a rare thing these days. Another blessing of taking a real day off, was that I realized how much I like what I do. I have been pretty happy since my thesis has started to come together, and have felt a sense of worth and progress each day. But yesterday I noticed that when my thoughts did move back to my work it was not with a sense of dread but with a smiling excitement to resume my research, with a fresher look at some of the things I have been trying to tackle. I picked up the book 'For love of insects' by Thomas Eisner at Borders and read for a while on our date. I loved how excited he was about his research. I started to find myself thinking jealous thoughts that I wished I liked my work as much as he did. As I reflected on my self negative statement a thought came to me. That statement was simply a relic of an older me. One that I have been trying to remove from my mind for a while. I wasn't unhappy, in fact, my next thought was that I should find a better way to archive everything I am doing so that in 30 years I can write a book about the things I am discovering. I was enthusiastic about my future, for the first time in 4 years! I have a tendency to belittle myself and compare myself to everyone around me. I have been trying to have a more positive outlook about who I am and see myself fitting in with those around me in a more symbiotic way, worrying less about how I compare to others, instead focusing on how I can better fit in and keep the gears moving forward. It seems to be working, and I have noticed that I am feeling more confident.

Today's photo is from the Fells wilderness reservation area near Boston, MA. I thought this circular rock pattern looked nice under the snow matted grass.